and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
