are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize