Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Randomize