I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
