What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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