You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
