theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize