watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
