I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
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