just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
