I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize