i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
