Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
