Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
