He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
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