You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
