carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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