Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
