Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
