Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
