I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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