i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
