Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
