"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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