Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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