At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
