The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
