i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize