We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
There's even glitter on my cock...
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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