Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
