So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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