i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Randomize
