Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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