You work out of a Hotel?
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
