bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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