she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
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