is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
