we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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