If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
