just tell him i said nine months
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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