Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
