I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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