Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
