they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
do herpes really smell.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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