Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Randomize
