There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
