Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
