Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
