I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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