He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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