I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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