what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
He passed out mid-signature
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
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