Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
