She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize